Forgiveness

The Gift in Forgiveness 

Holding onto anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.  Buddha 

Forgiveness is the way to total healing.  It is a gift we give ourselves. 

One of the most beautiful stories about forgiveness comes from the Bible.  It is the story of the Prodigal Son.  There was once a father who had two sons.  The eldest son worked hard and was very responsible.  The younger son wanted to have a good time.  He asked for his inheritance and went out and squandered it all on wild living.  When the son returned, penniless and ashamed, the father immediately forgave him and threw his arms around him in love.  The older brother felt resentment toward the brother and questioned his father on accepting the son back. The father’s reply was, “all that I have is yours. But today I rejoice, for the son I had lost has returned to me.”

Forgiveness, however, does not mean we condone hurtful action of others, but rather, we release our feelings to the Light and Love of God and thus free ourselves of the power others may have had over us.  Forgiveness is the way to wellness and spirituality. It is not easy to do however. Sometimes it takes a very long time to be at a place of forgiveness.  Eventually we want to start feeling good again.  We are tired of the burden of heaviness that we are carrying.  Forgiving is the one true gift we can give ourselves.

Here is one exercise to try along your journey toward forgiveness. 

1. Start bringing to mind the person or people who you feel have been hurtful to you in the past

2. Spend time visualizing each one on a stage surrounded by Light and enjoying life.

3. Pay attention to how you feel when you see them in this way.

4. When there is no negative reaction to this picture, you are on the right track.

5. View yourself in the same way-surrounded by Light and Love.  Continue to pay attention to how you feel.

6. When there is happiness inside, you are on the right track.

7. Whenever the old feelings come up, just switch on the new ones and soon the negativity will be gone.

The greatest example of forgiveness was given by Jesus on the Cross when he said of the people who were killing him, “forgive them for they know not what they do”.  Even in his pain and agony, he had compassion for the people who hated him.  We are called to do the same.

If we can truly live with forgiveness and non-judgment, our lives will be happier, healthier and longer. If you are reading this and feeling anger and resentment, you are not ready for this step.  Be patient with yourself. Give yourself more time to heal and come back to this at a later date. In the meantime, have compassion for yourself.  Forgiveness is the final stage on a sometimes long journey which also includes acceptance. With any new way of living, it takes time to implement new ways.  Be patient with yourself and just do your best. 

“ To forgive is to set the prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you.”

Heather